“If the only prayer you said in your whole life was, ‘thank you,’ that would suffice.” Meister Eckhart
It’s amazing how one simple, easy, positive action can change so much in a person’s life. One of the things that have had the biggest effect on my life is realising the power of gratitude. Simply giving thanks.
About three years ago I started my gratitude practice. I try to humble myself and hold a 2-minute gratitude session. I simply sit, with no distractions, close my eyes, and think about what I’m grateful for and who I’m grateful for. I don’t do it every day, but let me tell you, on the days I do it, it makes me very happy, puts a hop, skip and a jump into my day and I feel my heart truly sings.
It’s had more of a positive impact on my life than any other decision I’ve ever made.
Prior to adopting my gratitude practice, I was going through a difficult time in my life, those true rollercoaster rides, more than I would have liked. I wasn’t taking good care of myself, I was caught in the familiar trap of thinking negatively, eating badly, not exercising much, working too hard and I often felt tired and overwhelmed.
Knowing that I needed to make some changes in my life but not really sure where to start, I noticed that I was seeing the word gratitude more often around me. Seeing this word so often grabbed my attention and I was intrigued.
Despite my skepticism that something as simple as expressing appreciation could make a difference to my state of mind, I was curious enough to give it a try.
Many of us are skeptic and pessimistic by nature. I get that, I’ve been there myself and some days you roll back into that thinking. With so much negativity in the world, it can be hard not to be. Sometimes we find ourselves just surviving rather than thriving, and gratitude becomes an afterthought.
How often do we think if we’re skinnier, better looking, have a nicer house, get a promotion, had more money, have a happier relationship, then, we’ll be happier? I wasted a lot of my life feeling this way. For so long, I allowed my happiness to be conditional. So I became what I practiced. And, this made it harder to even see great things happening in my life as positive.
The truth is that if we can’t find happiness and be grateful for the small things in life, chances are we won’t find it in the larger things either.
So what changed? I changed my attitude and started practicing gratitude. I found something to be grateful for each day.
Why should that be? Why should the simple act of thinking about who and what I’m grateful for make such a big difference in my life?
- It reminds you of the positive things in your life. It makes you happy about the people in your life, whether they’re loved ones, friends or just a stranger you met who was kind to you in some ways.
- It turns bad things into good things. Having problems at work? Be grateful you have work. Be grateful you have challenges, and that life isn’t boring. Be grateful that you can learn from these challenges. Be thankful they make you a stronger person.
- It reminds you of what’s important. It’s hard to complain about the little things when you give thanks that your family are alive and healthy. It’s hard to get stressed out over paying bills when you are grateful there is a roof over your head.
- It reminds you to thank others. Saying “thank you” to someone can make a big difference in that person’s life. Calling them, emailing them, stopping by to say thank you. People like being appreciated for who they are and what they do. It costs you nothing, but makes someone else happy. And making someone else happy will make you happy.
If you’re interested in living a life of gratitude, here’s how to start:
- Take 2-3 minutes each day to give thanks (morning or evening), when you can become still. I find it best, before I go to sleep.
- You don’t have to do anything, other than close your eyes and silently give thanks.
- Start with three things each day to be thankful for. Whoever or whatever you’re grateful for. This one act can make a huge difference.
- Write them down in your journal, if you want to (maybe even decorate a book and call it your Gratitude Journal). You’ll see over time how the list just grows daily.
- Call to say thanks. Sometimes you might think about something nice that someone did for you. Perhaps you remember during your gratitude session. When you do, pick up the phone and call the person, just to say thanks. Let them know what they did that you’re grateful for, and why you appreciate it.
- Say thank you, in person. When someone does something nice for you, however small, try to remember to say thank you from your heart.
- Give thanks for “negative” things in your life. There’s always two ways to look at something; negative or an opportunity. Many times we think of something as negative, it’s stressful, harmful, sad, unfortunate, and difficult. But that same thing can be looked at in a more positive way. Giving thanks for those opportunities to grow, to experience life, to learn, to inspire, to be creative.
- Learn or if you like to write, create your own gratitude prayer. There are many prayers, religious or not, that can remind you to be grateful. Find one you like on the internet, and print it out or make it your desktop wallpaper. If you’re not religious, find one that doesn’t include the concept of God.
Eventually, I naturally started to see things more optimistically. It became easier to find something to be thankful for, even in negative situations.
What do I give thanks for, privately, in my little gratitude session? It varies every day. I thank all my clients, the readers of this site, for the time you’ve given me, just reading the articles when you have the chance.
I thank my loved ones, friends and mentors for all they do to me. I thank strangers who’ve shown me little acts of kindness. I thank God, for the life he’s given me, for the lessons I’ve learnt and grown from. I thank people around the world for the things they’ve done to make the world better. I thank myself, for things that I’ve done (it’s important to recognize your own accomplishments).
Try it yourself. At first, you may feel like you’re forcing it because you might feel uninspired. I’ve been there. But start with things we take for granted. Be thankful that you can breathe the air around you. Be thankful for your morning cup of coffee. Be thankful for the clothes on your back. Be thankful for a meal.
Starting with the obvious is the beginning of practicing gratitude. And once you’ve taken the first step, it’ll become second nature.
Now don’t get me wrong, I get tired from time to time. And, when I’m down long enough, sometimes I fall into my old ways of looking at things. Then, I have to begin practicing gratitude all over again. And, that’s okay. Practice makes perfect.
I learned to say thank you more often.
I was humbled and amazed by the impact that focusing on gratitude began to have on my life. Day by day, I felt calmer and more at peace and my overall energy levels and enthusiasm for life started to rise.
Within a couple of months…
- I was sleeping better
- I exercised more and committed to it
- My mood felt lighter and more joyful
- I have a more positive outlook on life
- I had increased focus at work, going for the goals I set
- I felt less stressed and irritable
- I was happier and more content
- I felt I could handle life challenges much better
- I appreciate everything more
- I’m meeting more like minded people
What this experience proved to me is that incorporating a gratitude practice into your life is one of the best and easiest decisions you can make for your own well-being.
It can help you to make more positive choices, take better care of yourself, feel empowered and to develop a positive ‘can do’ attitude to life.
It’s now been three years since I started this journey of gratitude and the benefits continue to grow and flourish, making it a very important part of my daily routine.
The other thing I started doing was to become more aware of other people and their efforts. I realized that others are struggling in some way, yet still contribute in some way to the universe. I started recognizing them and thanking other people more. I will go out of my way to make sure someone knew they were appreciated. I will say thank you more often. And I just learned to be more thankful for things that even seemed insignificant in the grand scheme of things and gave credit where credit was due.
I notice when I pause long enough to truly enjoy something out of each day, I feel more fulfilled. I feel more satisfied with my life. Simply put, it’s the act of being present in your life and not just being in a body that functions as a machine trying to get things done.
For instance, I might just step outside and close my eyes while listening to the birds, the wind blowing. Seriously. If you’ve never done it, try it. Clear your mind and just take their cheerful music in.
It’s important to have gratitude because it makes us appreciate our lives and focus on our blessings. Otherwise, we focus on what we don’t have and we’re never satisfied. And, that makes us waste precious moments of the life we have.
I hope you find something to be grateful for today.
Let me leave you with a prayer of gratitude that I’ve always found helps me, when my mind is maybe a bit too busy.
Be Thankful
Be thanful that you don’t already have everything you desire,
If you did, what would there be to look forward to?
Be thankful when you don’t know something
For it gives you the opportunity to learn.
Be thankful for the difficult times.
During those times you grow.
Be thankful for your limitations
Because they give you opportunities for improvement.
Be thankful for each new challenge,
Because it will build your strength and character.
Be thankful for your mistakes
They will teach you valuable lessons.
Be thankful when you’re tired and weary
Because it means you’ve made a difference.
It is easy to be thankful for the good things.
A life of rich fulfillment comes to those who are
also thankful for the setbacks.
GRATITUDE can turn a negative into a positive.
Find a way to be thankful for your troubles
and they can become your blessings.
~ Author Unknown ~